I am exist… We are exist…

A Portrait


Just opened several website and found this, “Damaged people are dangerous. They know they can survive.”

Yeah, more than 365 day and I am still exist…

I know, maybe it sounds a bit strange but it’s okay to be sentimental sometimes.

Someone ask me how it’s like? For me, it’s like rats crawling up. Hufffttt, but it’s just time which can make everything so beautiful. The time which can make you and I will forget -or at least decrease- the painful we felt. If –maybe- we must let go of each other, that’s not the fault of something or someone. Nothing wrong cause this is life which take us to it’s line. Just like the river which leads to the ocean at the end, just like that what we are now. We need to feel the dew, understand every flutter of the butterfly’s wings, smile to every new morning, thankful to every heal of the breath –which all- very precious. You will understand later that those are something which makes this world keep on moving. It moves to every flame of soul, the hidden frighten, the singing tears, the big steps of the braver, and for all who still want to enjoy the move. Don’t let the cloud of the last yesterday rain, catch us and cover how flame you are in the darkness. Just dance and turn around. Because this wound can make us stronger. What we need to do is loose a bit of that grip and let us fall. But I believe we will forget it fast and learn to wake up without anybody’s help because we can. We can learn, can’t we?

My hubby is… ah what to say again?! I losing words. He is the one who said that I am a beautiful-bald-head, Casper in his life, and the most important thing for him. He is the one who stand still beside me when I wanna go.  The one who still believe that losing my hair is normal, gaining weight is a plus, sleeping late is acceptable, living with my parents is a good idea, and doing nothing is forgivable.  You will never know the feeling, I swear! You will never ever know the feeling, to be like me and to have someone like him in your side!

Many things that I have to throw away in my life, but really, I’m happy with this. Especially to have and be had by the eyes which I swear really comfortable to me. Just sitting, talking, drinking coffee together, laughing, kidding, and some claps of hand in the shoulder. I don’t know what to write. I just feel something -warm come up– inside. I feel that the mountain ice inside of me is melting slowly and starts to perform it’s original. Yeah, there were the times when we used to be so free. I love the time like this. The time when there are only me and him, yeah just us. We who talk with heart. We who are very simple, for everything…

There was a star inside, but it starts to fade. My dear, whatever happen in our life, I just want you to know that we are something…

I love you and will always be.


~ by Indira Singgih on August 3, 2011.

One Response to “I am exist… We are exist…”

  1. Where are you now dear?

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